why coffee why?

so i had too much coffee today… and my alarm will go off in 3.5 hours. Oh well. My job doesnt involve any heavy lifting. ahem. so yeah i got that job i was worried about. And its so awesome. Weird too. it’s classified as an internship. I get paid and everything but there are no benefits like insurance or paid vacation. It’s funny how everyone just assumes i’m 20 years old because i go to college and have an internship. i should get a tshirt made: SORRY I CANT HANDLE THE REAL WORLD on the front. and FUCK OFF on the back. Most of my coworkers are very pleasant but some constantly make remarks about my inexperience or stupidity based on my intern status. ive been told i have a young face but whatever, its fucking rude. A perk though: i can wear jeans and take zero responsiblity because OOPS i’m the intern.

i share an office with real interns. (*Not their actual names although i’m sure they would prefer them to the ones they have) Gasolina* is 21 and acts like she is 12. Carcinojenni* is 22 and dresses like she’s the president of the universe. she looks ridiculous in her power dresses and high heels. She’s very tan. She told me she wanted to look just like me when she was 34. I told her to start applying sunscreen. Gasolina loves to remind me that with our age difference i could be her Mom. If i was her mom she would’ve grown up in an orphanage. she thought that was funny but i was dead serious.

Even with cancer, i’m feeling the tanned body peer pressure. Carcinojenni and her damned golden skin. i bought some Clarins self tanning gel from Sephora. i’m still the same shade of white girl i was before i applied it. maybe when daybreaks i’ll be all holly berry.

tuesday i get my prk surgery. nausea.